We Are Not the Worst Thing We’ve Ever Done

We live in a world where judgment is quick, opinions are loud, and compassion can be hard to come by. Every scroll, comment, or headline can feel like a harsh reminder that we’re expected to be perfect — or else we risk being labeled, written off, or shamed. But the truth is, none of us are perfect. We’ve all made mistakes. We’ve all said or done things we wish we could take back. That’s part of being human.

What’s heartbreaking is how often people are reduced to the worst thing they’ve ever done — as if that single moment defines them forever. As if that misstep cancels out the complexity of their story, their pain, their growth. And that’s just not fair.

Let me be clear: this isn’t about ignoring harm or bypassing accountability. Accountability is necessary — it’s how we grow, how we repair, how we rebuild trust. But accountability and compassion can coexist. We can acknowledge harm and still hold space for someone’s humanity. We can expect better from people and still believe they’re capable of change.

I know what it feels like to carry shame — deep, heavy shame for things I wish I’d done differently. Healing from that hasn’t been easy. Processing guilt, owning my story, forgiving myself — it’s been some of the hardest inner work I’ve ever done. And it’s even harder when others pile on their own judgments without understanding what you were going through, or who you were back then.

If we all knew then what we know now, we wouldn't have made some of the choices we did. That’s the point. Growth is hindsight. We don’t evolve because we’re flawless — we evolve because we’re not. And that’s where grace comes in.

People can transform. I know because I have. I am not the same person I was three years ago. Or five. Or even one. I’ve grown, softened, strengthened, and reclaimed parts of myself that I didn’t even know I had lost. I am proof that people change. And I believe in second chances — because I needed them, too.

So let this be a reminder: don’t judge someone for the worst thing they’ve done. Don’t hold them hostage to their past if they’re trying to grow. And please — don’t let someone else’s opinion make you feel like you aren’t worthy of healing, forgiveness, or a fresh start.

Shame thrives in silence. Judgment breeds in misunderstanding. But compassion? That’s what changes lives.

You are not your past. You are not your mistakes. And you don’t owe anyone perfection to deserve peace.

Let them talk — their opinions say more about them than they ever will about you.

Keep healing. Keep growing. Keep choosing compassion — for yourself and for others.