Let’s Call It What It Is: Holding On Is Hurting You

It’s time we say it out loud:
Your mind is afraid of change.
Your ego is terrified of letting go.
And most of what you’re still clinging to?
It’s just energy. Stuck. Heavy. Unprocessed.

We talk about healing, but we rarely talk about how hard it actually is to let go—of pain, of betrayal, of the unfair things that happened to us. The truth is, we don’t want to let go. Not because we like the pain, but because on some level, our ego believes holding on keeps us safe. That if we let it go, it means what happened didn’t matter. Or worse—it means they get away with it.

But here’s the hard truth: holding on doesn’t punish them—it punishes you.

I’ve been there.
I’ve been manipulated.
Abused.
Broken by someone I loved.
I’ve lived through moments I wouldn’t wish on anyone. And for a long time, I felt like I was the one paying the price while he walked away untouched. I screamed inside—where is the justice in that?

But eventually… I stopped waiting for the apology that would never come.
I stopped needing him to hurt the way I hurt.
And I started choosing me.

No, it wasn’t easy. It was fucking brutal. I cried. I yelled. I spiraled. But through all of it, I realized something life-changing:

Resentment is a prison you build around yourself.
And forgiveness?
Forgiveness is how you walk out.

I’m not talking about pretending it didn’t happen. I’m not saying what they did was okay. I’m saying: you deserve peace. And you will never reach it if you keep feeding the fire inside you with hate, bitterness, and anger.

You think you’re holding on to your power by not forgiving—but really?
You’re giving it away.
Every single day you let what they did live rent-free in your mind, they win.
But the moment you decide to let go?
That’s the moment you take your power back.

Let’s be clear: letting go is not weakness. It’s strength.
It’s the bravest, hardest, most soul-expanding thing you will ever do.

You have to walk through the fear.
You have to feel what you’ve been avoiding.
You have to stop numbing and start facing.
You have to kill off the ego version of you that’s stuck in survival—and meet the real you underneath.

And when you do?
There’s peace on the other side.
I know because I found it.

Today, I don’t carry the weight of the past. I’m not angry. I don’t want revenge. I don’t wish anyone harm. That’s not because what happened wasn’t horrific—it’s because I finally saw that staying angry wasn’t justice. It was poison. And I chose to stop drinking it.

Your body feels everything. That energy lives in you. It turns into stress. Into illness. Into disease. That’s not spiritual fluff. That’s biology. That’s trauma. That’s truth.

So if you need a sign to let go… this is it.
Not for them.
For you.
For your life. For your health. For your joy. For the version of you who is so ready to be free.

You’re not weak for wanting peace.
You’re not letting them win by moving on.
You’re winning by choosing freedom.

Trust me—I’ve lived both sides.
And I promise you:
Peace is worth the fight.